I have gotten very fond of him now

We are used to chatting up to 10 hours daily until exams came. He had already gotten used to our everyday conversations that each time I spoke of going offline to study, he found it unbearable. To occupy himself, he started looking for another girl to keep him company. I’m sure that’s one of the reasons he cheated.
There was a day I asked him about those girls and he was like how will he block them; that do I want boredom to kill him. I didn’t know he already had something with them.
This makes me feel insecure so I don’t spend long hours reading anymore cause I’m always trying to create time for him everyday; that’s one distraction.
Now the little time I’m supposed to spend reading, he always asks for us to see. Even today after we saw in church from morning till about 3PM in the afternoon, he asked me to visit him in the evening regardless but I refused.
He really doesn’t get the fact that I have exams and that’s a distraction. I’ve also gotten very fond of him now. I really can’t stay 3 straight hours without trying to reach him and it’s not helping me. The few times we would agree that I stay offline and study; I’d still chat him up or try to call him and it doesn’t help me study at all.
I don’t know how to handle any of these anymore.
Please help me

I've also gotten very fond of him nowI've also gotten very fond of him now

 

This Post Has 9 Comments

  1. Doc Dee

    Any man that doesn’t care for your academics and future is bad company!
    Do not put your future at risk because of a man that obviously doesn’t care about you..
    I’m guessing you’re a medical student? And if that’s true, he should have known what he was getting into in the first place…
    For now, let your priority be your education not him…

  2. Deolabliss

    Any man that doesn’t put your education, life goals, emotions and health first doesn’t deserve a second of your time.
    Any guy that wants to cheat on you would surely find an excuse most times stupid excuses just to cheat and justify himself.
    Sis, I gotta tell you as black to black woman, that man ain’t deserve your time and you ain’t gonna she’d no tear for that buffon.
    Focus on your studies, become a smart ass woman and trust me he’s gonna come running like a lost puppy

  3. mercy

    Any man that doesn’t see and choose to understand that your academics is your first priority doesn’t love you especially if you are medical student. He should encourage you to be the best in your academics. Any man who claims to love you should be able to be your number 1 supporter in anything you choose to do.

  4. Loyin

    First, chatting with anyone for 10 hours daily is a big waste of time. Quality of communication in relationship does not depend on the number of hours you spend chatting but how productive your conversation is. We have our lives outside a relationship, you both need to grow. Not just academically, personal growth and all. Your partner should be your biggest cheer leader. He should even encourage you to study.

    This is what you can do, if you want to continue with the relationship. Agree on a particular time of the day you wanna talk. It could be 30mins at night. 30 productive minutes and don’t exceed that time. Do that for a start. It will help you concentrate better. You are addicted to chatting with him already.

    He needs to develop himself too, no purpose driven man sits and chats for 3 hours. Even married people don’t sit and chat for hours daily.
    If he truly loves you, he will encourage you to study and grow all round

  5. Acquafortis8

    All I can say is that you’re obsessed…
    Why not tryna loose every form of communication?
    If you can’t do that yourself, let a friend help you do it…Delete everything concerning him;his pictures, previous conversations you’ve had, his phone messages and messages you’ve sent to him(so you won’t be tempted to trace his digits),delete your chats with him on whatsapp so you won’t be tempted to trace his line as well…. Assume you can’t be together anymore and don’t forget to cry once you’re done…

    To be very honest, I consider any dude dating a medical person as lucky.. You’re worth more than his stupid love and you’re worth more than the coconut head abeg…. I am seriously in love with this colleague of mine buh i chose not to open up to her to avoid distracting her as she’s this very smart Ass… Am I not human?

    It never did stopped me from loving her or prompting me to love someone else either as I’m seriously waiting for a perfect moment to do the needful somedays….. Forget the coconut head abeg… You’ll find someone like u somedays

    1. Lauren

      I go with this.. wonderful idea..

      It’s not going to be easy, but you’ve gat to do what you’ve gat to do..
      It better to bear the pain than face the consequences..

  6. Faith shulammite

    She needs to prioritize
    If he is her top priority then she should keep trying to please him.. One which I’d not advise because the guy is inconsiderate and selfish and there is nothing that you’d do for such people that’d would be enough
    Your parent/guardian sent you to school to redd and pass… Prioritize that and make them proud… Any relationship that would not encourage you to do just that and push you to be better is toxic… Toxicity kills
    She should Explain to him calmly why it’s important for her to be offline for some time during the day and if he doesn’t understand then walk away… It goes a long way to show he doesn’t have her best interest at heart
    🚶🏽‍♀️🚶🏽‍♀️🚶🏽‍♀️

  7. Byen

    Seriously you need to put your academics first. You have to Excel and as a student you need a lot of time to study. Really talk to him and if he refuses to understand you may just have to cut off ties with him so you can focus on what’s important. More so if he can’t let you do what’s important to you I think it’s dangerous to your future.Your future is very important. It won’t be easy but common, you can do it.

  8. Dr Hall

    You need breakup ASAP, you can’t afford to sacrifice your life on altar of relationship. Funny thing is that if you fail, the guy will leave, who want to associate with a failure?
    Any relationship that can not help you achieve your dream doesn’t worth, even as the matter of fact you’re in toxic relationship, yes toxic. I know no one can advice someone in love to break but I pray and hope the relationship doesn’t break you before you do the needful.

  9. DERA232

    Hmmm….that is absolutely one of the disadvantages of engaging in a relationship while in school… Just try to explain to him that your education is your priority as you don’t want to fail and (always note that no person likes to stay around a person without progress) but if after explaining to him about the Ned for you to study ,my dear girlfriend LET HIM GO as he doesn’t mean well for you….A good how truly loves his woman will always support her most especially in her education as the case maybe. Check it out, if you keep sacrificing your study time for your guy, and at the end you get to fail your course; he will start losing interest in you….So pay now and enjoy later better guys are out there.

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